Charles Smith ~ Daddy

today is his birthday. it doesn't matter that he's not here on earth to celebrate...it will always be his birthday. he would've been 87. i even had a dream in the wee hours of this morning and he was there, laughing and having a great time.

i remember his smile. i remember a lot of things about him. his laughter and his ridiculously funny sneezes. his fierce protection. his gentleness. his endless stories. he wasn't perfect. neither am i. but he loved me and i knew it. he always told me so. he spent time with me. he would tell me about the things that he loved.... especially his dreams. i rolled my eyes about alot of things he said. some of those are the very things that i treasure today.

parents get a short sell during the course of our growing up but maybe in the end we'll be remembered well. with a smile. maybe a regret at not having listened and embraced more of what was shared. he always said "no regrets"..... but i have a few. i wish that i'd loved him just a little bit more. been less critical. given forgiveness like he gave to me. spent a little more time with him.

but today i can reflect on the giant of a man who shaped my life
and say 'thank you, daddy. i love you, too!'

and happy birthday!

cassandra jean